If I could start over and have 10 years to finish my
bachelor’s degree, I would definitely major in mathematics. I courageously
decided to take Math 110 after a friend of mine told me that it was the easiest
math course that they offered and (while it wasn’t true) I was lazy enough that
I decided to enroll in the 2 term course without doing any research.
I can give a bunch of excuses and explanations as to why I
failed to hand in any of my webwork or assignments. I mean, I just did not have
the time to dedicate 10-15 hours a week, especially since I was taking 6
courses and had four students that I was tutoring. But alas, an excuse is an excuse
and I know that if I truly applied myself and valued the education that I was receiving
then I could have passed my first term.
Of course, with the lack of effort comes a lack of a
passable grade, at least for math anyways. Fast forward a few months later, and
I realized that this single math course has taught me what the past four years
of university failed to. Not only did I spin around my work ethic, I also
learned how to problem solve not just calculus equations but also real-life
situations. With English I could cruise by without a shred of effort and get
decent marks. Not only was this mentality unhealthy but it just wasn’t
realistic or applicable to my life if I were to graduate and get a job.
Knowing that I had to get an impossibly high mark in order
to pass, I started picking up the slack. Every office hour, I showed up and
kept my prof busy past his set times. Every break I was at the Math Learning
Center, flagging down the tutors, every Wednesday at 9 am I made sure to attend
the PASS classes that were offered, and most importantly I made sure that I
showed up to class at 8 am every morning. I realized that in life no one just offers
you success for no reason. You need to be proactive and get what you want by
being resourceful and investing time, money and effort into whatever it is you’re
trying to achieve.
I didn’t “get” or understand the material in a day. Not in a
week either. Success is cumulative and it requires consistency. As the saying
goes, Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither is knowledge.
My mentality used to be: “I really really really really need to pass so I can get my degree and get
out of here”. I said this to my prof at least three times. He shook his head
and told me that finishing shouldn’t be my only priority, but if it came to it
I really should invest the extra year into learning things properly. I am
paying for education after all…(right?). At first, I just nodded and thought, “you wouldn’t understand I’m already in my
fifth year. If I don’t pass now I have to take summer school and I won’t
graduate in the spring. I don’t even need this stupid math course, why would I
want to waste a year waiting for my degree…” and so on, but now I realized
that what he said is right. Time is of the essence, it’s true, but your
efficiency is invalid if you don’t take the time to set up a strong foundation.
At one point or another, these cracks that you neglected will crumble.
Life is uncertain. Nothing will ever go the way you plan. I
might not pass math, but I tried my best. I shed tears of frustration but I was
also happy. Effort and time reciprocate really the sweetest gratification. I
love math and really see that it’s powerful and beautiful and all that you
probably won’t believe. If I don’t pass I know that I can at least say that for
the last portion I did try my best, and with that I think I have to be
satisfied with it.
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| welcome to the dark side |
